Revealing One’s Sins

Revealing One’s Sins

Question:

Assalamu Alaykum 

I would like to know, if in a marriage i get asked about any bad habits of mine, whether she should know I used to masterbate?

Answer:

In the name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful,

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Brother in Islam,

Evidently, you understand the gravity of the sin of masturbation, hence you have considered it to be a bad habit. If a person was involved in a sin and repents sincerely to Allah Ta’ala, Allah Ta’ala will readily accept a person’s repentance. You should make a firm intention to lead a chaste life and to never return to such a vile act.

It is important to understand that there is a difference between one’s habits and sins. When pursuing marriage, one may disclose certain bad habits, such as temper, procrastination, etc, as these may directly impact your marital relationship. However, one should not reveal one’s sins. If Allah Ta’ala has concealed one’s sins, one should not expose them to others as Allah Ta’ala has concealed it. Revealing your past will only cause ill feelings to occur in your future spouse. Moreover, your sins do not directly affect her.  Rather, it is something which is between you and Allah.

By intending marriage, you wish to begin a future with your spouse. You should let go of the past and strive to live a chaste life. Should this problem arise in the future, at that point, you may discuss this weakness with her. Together you may both work to come to a solution.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Mirza-Zain Ibn Ameer Baig

Student - Darul Iftaa

Montréal, Québec, Canada

Checked and Approved by,

Mufti Ebrahim Desai.